I'm going to a funeral and know that I'll be crying. Will the vail come low enough to cover my greiving eyes?

I am sorry for your loss. Yes it will, just as depicted in the photo. That’s how I wore it because I have an eye issue I was using it to help distract from. Keep in mind however, the netting is just how pictured, therefore your eyes will still be visible. It is lovely for the price, I must say!

What is the veil material? From being packaged, the veil is bent out of shape. I need to reshape it without melting it. Any suggestions?

Mine was the same way when I received it - the veil was bent. I sprayed a little water on it, then straightened out the creases by weighing the entire veil down. Place the hat part on a hat stand or similar object ( a free standing paper towel holder works great, the kind where the paper towels slide down over top ). Then, with hat balanced on the rod knob at top, pull the veil down the way it should be - down over face if you had it on your head. Secure the bottom edges of veil so that veil edge is in downward position using wood clothes pins. Don't use plastic pins because they are not heavy enough. Start on one side & attach clothespins -part that attaches - facing upward toward hat. Space the pins about every 2 or 3 inches around bottom of veil. When pins are attached on bottom of veil all way around, leave hat on hat rack or paper towel rod for several days. This should straighten out veil & eliminate the creases in it. The longer the veil is weighted down, the better, but you should see improvement in the way veil hangs after a few days. Mine has been weighted for a few months now & I take off the pins every week or so to check it & it is like it never was crimped at all. It hangs freely & curves on the sides just it does over my face when I wear it. I leave it on the stand & cover it with a plastic ziploc bag to keep it ready to wear & dust - free. The veil is made out of a plastic material. I would not iron it, but it may be ok to use a steamer on it, but if so, I would be very careful not to steam the hat part, because the decorations are attached with glue & you could cause them to detach if steam gets on them. I did not try using steam on mine, & using clothespins to weigh down the veil has worked great on mine.

can the feather thing be taken off easily?

I didn’t look at it that great but I would assume so, you could just snip it off by where it’s glued in.

Where are the pearls and alligator clip to put the hat on?

the alligator clip is in the center of the underside of the hat..it also comes with a covered head band that you can us with the clip as well. Some hats had pearls some didn't? However I loved everyone I bought!