Don't Make Me Count to Three: a Mom's Look at Heart-Oriented Discipline

Looking for a book on parenting that is based on biblical principles but is also quick to read, humorous and accessible? This is the book you are looking for. Extremely practical and grounded in the Bible. This book has already made a difference in my approach to discipline, which has had a positive impact on my children.

This is easily the best, most practical and non complex book on the subject of parenting. Straight from the heart and entirely based on the Truth. Thank you Ginger for a few practical pearlers that are already - in just a few days - making a massive difference.

Sheesh some folks really need to go and read the bible for what it is an old story written by many. Children need us there for love not fear. Children need our guidance not beatings. Children need to know if they mess up they can come to us and say, not be terrified by us. Children do not ever need a beating for misdeeds just redirection You may say it's a spanking it isn't its child abuse which ever way you slice it and sadly in America you can spank, beat a minor and it is called chastisment. Here hitting kids with implements is illegal and rightly so. What is in this book shouldn't be allowed ever. There are other ways to raise rounded children.

We really enjoyed this little tome. As above, we found it the perfect quick-read companion to Shepherding a Child's Heart (Tedd Tripp). It has a lot of practical stuff in there and is good-humoured, gracious and good to pick up and put down for the busy parent.

This is a fantastic book. The way it encourages us to deal with children's behaviour is so respectful to children and really educated them in there own emotions and behviours. It seems some people are getting very hung up on the smacking element. Although this is used in the book (where the lady is from smacking is not illegal) it is by no means essential for her fantastic godly methods to work. I was struggling with the fact I was feeling so angry with my children and tempted to smack sometimes, however since implementing her methods we are able to deal with things more calmly and with NO smacking. I highly reckomemd this book, however I feel if you are not a Christian then you may struggle with her methods as your heart will just not be in tune.

This author has an insightful view on the Biblical parenting with many good advice but I absolutely disagree with the way she validates spanking. This is not Biblical despite her interpretations…her point of view is not based on deeply researching the topic of the rod throughout the Bible, rather basing her view on quotes from other people and cut and paste verses taken out of context. Please do your own research and look at the original meaning of the words which is in Greek and Hebrew. The Bible is not literal rather symbolical so when speaking of the rod it should be seen as a symbol of leadership not a weapon.

Contrary to other reviews this in not a book about spanking. Nor is it a book about being a dictator. Plowman has written a useful and helpful book that deals as much with the parent's attitude as it does with the child's. It is a balanced book. She frequently highlights and underlines failures of parents to be loving and God-centred in their raising of their children. And she is humble enough to illustrate these failures from her own experience. It is balanced also in that it recognises the need to react differently with different children and with different ages of children - for her there is no 'one rule fits all' thinking. It is a practical book. It is an ideal companion to Ted Tripp's "Shepherding a Child's Heart". I felt Tripp's book was light on practical examples, but Plowman redresses that with many illustrations of what to do and what not to do. It is a heart-oriented book. Her approach is not simply to correct the behaviour, but to get to the roots of the behaviour which lie in the heart. It's relatively easy to create a little automaton who will obey out of fear or reward, and then rebel when your back is turned. Plowman is not interested in such an approach. She seeks to get to the heart - and often that means dealing with your own heart first. It is a biblical book. As a pastor I dislike intensely seeing verses quoted out of context. Contrary to other reviews Mrs Plowman does not do this. Instead she shows every evidence that she understands the context. But more importantly she calls parents to act not as they find easiest, nor in a way that is comfortable to them, but in the way God requires. It is also a direct book. Plowman is not afraid to call a spade a spade when it comes to some of the methods advocated by parents, for example 'counting to three', 'making excuses for children'. She shows how these only teach children to disobey until you get to '3' as opposed to obeying immediately and to make excuses when they are disobedient. They are counterproductive and naive. It must also be pointed out that the majority of this book is about verbal correction. And when it comes to deal with physical correction, it spends as much time correcting wrong ideas, wrong motives and wrong approaches. Here there is also much wisdom and balance. Plowman shows the vast difference between biblical chastisement and unbiblical chastisement. As a pastor and a parent I welcome this book. Those who read it and consider how it applies in their situation will find much help. I would also recommend reading Ted Tripp's "Shepherding a Child's Heart" along with this for it lays a lot of the foundations.

Many Christian parenting books are insightful and biblical ("Shepherding a Child's Heart") and others are practical - this book is both. It is written by a fellow mother in a readable style that isn't overly intellectual or preachy, but is thoroughly biblical. It gets to the root of the problem by teaching you how to reach your child's heart, not just change their behaviour, plus it gives many day-to-day examples to help you apply these concepts. Buy this book!! It will give you the both the vision and the words to disciple your children's hearts and help them change their behaviour to be more Christlike and glorifying to God, and to bring peace to your home.

I have bought many of these for friends. After a gap we had a 4th child and needed a refresher course. This was perfect with some how to's along with the reasons behind it. I found it very effective, even with my teens.

Helpful. I was part of a book club and we did this book and it was very enjoyable. I moved before we could finish it but I really enjoyed it so far.

Questo libro è veramente utile e interessante, e fornisce un sacco di consigli pratici veramente apprezzati. Ho particolarmente apprezzato le spiegazioni riguardanti i rinforzi positivi prima e dopo le punizioni e la lunga parte incentrata sulle sculacciate, che spiega come e quando darle in modo corretto ed efficace. Lo stile è piacevole e facilmente comprensibile anche dai non madre lingua, basta avere una conoscenza base dell'inglese. Vivamente consigliato a tutti i genitori.

Si many great insights and some practical wisdom too !

I recommend reading this book during parenting. It's practical, back by biblical evidence and wisdom surely had given be tools and a guide to be a better parent to my children. It's answered so many questions I have had for months now, about discipline, and raising them in the right way. Definitely worth the read!