Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate
H**T
Another assessment from a life coach
Very smart authors. Very smart advice. Will try to internalize the importance of “core concerns “ that drive emotions and interactions.
S**Y
To The Point
Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro in their book "Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate," give practical examples and tips for how to use, control and decipher emotions in the context of negotiations. The application of their theories to their own experiences roots this narrative in truth and practicality. Throughout this book the authors examine how emotions might change the approach to and experience of negotiation preparation, identification of bargaining alternatives, application of ethics and resolution of conflicts.Fisher and Shapiro believe that emotions will and should always be present at the negotiation, but a negotiator should not waste her time interpreting all emotions but rather work to figure out how the emotion tie back to core concerns. These core concerns include: appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status, and role.I liked that the authors brought examples of formal negotiations and everyday negotiations to show how the identification of emotion is less important than the identification of core concerns to the resolution of a disagreement and the longevity of relationships. The book is an easy read, and the authors have organized it so that it is easily referenced as needed
A**S
A must read
A must read look in reframing emotions and feelings in a negotiation and understanding the factors that most affect our emotions and feelings (appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, role, status) and how these five categories affect how we deal with and interact with others with some good ideas and advice on how to go about improving things as it relates to those 5 categories to create more effective negotiation.
C**D
Starts strong & fizzles
Value in the book: Chapters 1-5 and 9, and "End Matter" section. Comparison: Negotiators using this book would be trounced by those using "Getting to Yes" AND "How to win friends and influence people."Unless you've never read any social psych or negotiation books, only the first 4 chapters, section headlines, and the 7 elements table in End Matters section are helpful. The rest is A LOT of hypothetical (i.e., should, could, might...).
C**A
Good companion to Getting More
This is a great companion book to Stuart Diamond's Getting More. I was able to apply the framework presented in this book in the context of Getting More but I highly recommend reading both books to build your full toolkit for negotiations.
E**E
One of the best recent negotiation books
The book is very well written and offers a very innovative methodology for using emotions in the context of personal and professional negotiations. One of the best books in this field I have read in recent times and I definitely recommend it to anyone interested in improving negotiation skills.
E**E
Interesting
this book is interesting in that the authors assert that in conflict people are usually lacking in one of their "core" needs/values and if you can just figure out which one it is you can solve many problems. It seems a little idealistic but also partly true if you listen to a lot of the grumbling that goes on in your work place you'll probably hear something that can be traced back to an idea in the book.
D**N
Recycling books makes cent$
It was fine. No problems that bothered the reading material. Thank you for recycling the book.
C**C
Added value
If interested in negotiation you will find this book to be of added value as many books on negotiation cover only the rational aspects of negotiation. This book follows the Harvard Program on Negotiation (PON) school of thought of going for win-win interactions.Emotions do happen and this book covers nicely possible approaches in dealing with this important element (while keeping full respect for yourself and for the other party at the negotiation table).The 5 key points covered here (express appreciation, build affiliation, respect autonomy, acknowledge status and role) are very handy to know and to apply whether you are negotiating, building a (business) relationship or dealing with customers at all levels (business development, consulting, sales, contract negotiation, complaint handling, problem solving,...).If interested in negotiation I would suggest reading additional material as this book only deals with the emotional aspects. I would certainly suggest Beyond winning, Getting to Yes, Getting past No, Negotiation Genius, 3D Negotiation, Hostage at the table, or any negotiation course at Harvard Law School - the Program on Negotiation (PON).A great read...Contents:I The Big Picture1. Emotions are powerful, always present, and hard to handle2. Address the concern, not the emotionII Take the initiative3. Express appreciation - Find merit in what others think, feel or do and show it4. Build Affiliation - Turn an adversary into a colleague5. Respect autonomy - Expand yours (and don't impinge upon theirs)6. Acknowledge status - Recognize high standing wherever deserved7. Choose a fulfilling role - and select the activities within inIII Some additional advice8. On strong negative emotions - They happen. Be ready.9. On being prepared - Prepare on process, substance, and emotion10. On using these ideas in the `Real world' - A personal account by Jamil Mahuad, former president of EcuadorIV ConclusionV End matterSeven elements of negotiationGlossaryWorks consultedAcknowledgementsAnalytical table of contentsAbout the authors
A**N
Highly recommend practical guide with lots of good real-life examples
Good practical guide to make you think about the way you communicate with others, whether they are a family member, work colleague or complete stranger, and not just in a strict negotiation setting as the title may wrongly suggest. It must be said, the book is not about manipulating emotions, our own or those of others, but rather it provides an advice on how we can positively work with our emotions to reach agreement. The authors distinguish and focus on five 'core concerns' that motivate people: appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status and a fulfilling role. I am pretty sure each will strike a chord with you to some extent and cause you to re-assess the way you interact with others. It certainly did so for me.A great read with lots of real-life examples that you will easily be able to relate to with your own experiences. Indeed, if you are one of those people who are always looking to do a bit of introspection and improve your character, then I cannot recommend this book for you enough.
M**P
A phenomenal book.
I can't express my admiration to the author. Thank you for a great job. A loads of fantastic advice and insights to use. Simply love it.
K**R
Nothing of substance in this book other than be nice to people and they are more likely to cooperate ...
Nothing of substance in this book other than be nice to people and they are more likely to cooperate with you.
T**S
You can't help but learn from the masters who proved ...
You can't help but learn from the masters who proved their work in the most difficult situations around the world and come back with something so simple that we can all learn from it