Listen: Five Simple Tools to Meet Your Everyday Parenting Challenges

I count this book as one of the best parenting books I've read. It fits our parental style which probably can be summed up as firm but warm, caring and respectful to each other. This book taught us how to use listening as a tool. Yes sure we listened, but there is a difference to how you really "listen". It opens up your mind to a different approach, to a different way to assess the situations. I am very grateful to the authors who spent the time and wrote this book and shared their knowledge. Thanks to this book, now we have an amazingly powerful tool in our pockets that I foresee will be useful for the rest of our lives. In fact, this has saved me from a potential tantrum yesterday (and that's why I am writing this review now, because I really need to credit this book for the knowledge it gave me). Not only did the tantrum not go full-blown, through "listening", I found out that my child was actually using it (by being difficult) as an "intro", as a way to connect, so she could tell me that something went wrong at school earlier that day. I do wish we read this book a couple years earlier, so our family didn't have to go through (or test out) the other techniques, like discipline or threats. In our experience, none of them worked well. Most felt like winning the battle and losing the war. And they just didn't feel right to us. I got this book while reading The Whole Brain Child and personally I found the two books complimentary to each other. This book is easy to read, well written, full of real-life examples, and most importantly, the technique really works. We are not able to experience listening partnerships due to our circumstances but we could see how that can be tremendously useful to those who can.

I've been using the tools for a year now, and It's getting better and better for me! I've read over 150 parenting books (child development, child psychology, etc), and this one is in top THREE for me :) What I loved about this book is that it gives you tools to manage your OWN emotions, which is the most important thing in parenting. It also explained child's needs from a DEVELOPMENTAL perspective, and it's a life-changer. Our society expects children to BEHAVE, even if it's developmentally inappropriate. All the tools are evidence-based. I wish I got this book when my first child was born, I would have avoided so many parenting mistakes! But it's ok - it's never too late, one can always build connection RIGHT NOW, no matter where you are. It is so inspiring, and there's so much compassion all around. The world would be a kinder, more compassionate place if this book were distributed at the hospitals and birthing centers. Feeling deeply grateful to have found this loving, non-punitive parenting approach. The best thing is... I feel so good about myself, and about my parenting, and about my kids, and my husband. I understand them better. Now our house is full of giggles and cooperation. It's so good to know I am supporting my kids the way THEY need, vs what I THINK I should be giving them :) Parenting is such hard work. I see devoted, loving parents not getting through to their kids...Loosing close connections once they kids are older, all the while trying SO hard. Get this book so that you can stay connected (maintain a close relationship) to your child once they have a CHOICE whether to hang out with you or not.

This, by far, has been my favorite parenting book. Not only is it grounded in science, but it is very easy to read, and very applicable to any stage of your child's life. The tools are user friendly and simple in concept. However, applying them can feel a little challenging, as most of us didn't grow up being parented in this connected and compassionate way. So it takes some time and support to learn new ways and carve new paths. I love that there are other layers of support, not just the book - you can find help on the Hand in Hand facebook page or in the paid facebook coaching group. It is an investment that has paid dividends in my family, and has changed me as a person for the better. While of course at times big fears come up about messing up and doing it all wrong, using the Five Listening Tools in the book has given me such a strong basis of confidence, and deep knowing, that even when I mess up, connection and compassion can make the repairs and keep us on a good path. I wish I had been parented in this way!!!

This book has changed my life and my son's. I recieved this book a few weeks ago and started applying some of the concepts in my parenting approach and they have helped shift our dynamics, understand the impact on my emotional life due to the way I was raised and has given me the framework to create a listening partnership with another parent (this is happening for the first time tomorrow). I now can provide the space for my son (2yrs 9mo) to process his emotions. The first time I did this he was able to let out so much, by the end of his expression he looked at me and said, "wow there was a lot in there". Afterwards he asked me to lay down and he laid on my chest and fell asleep. As a single father in a new city, this work is priceless for me. Such deep gratitude.

Hand in Hand Parenting works & it feels deeply good & right. I'm a single mom with a 4-year old & an 8-year old. My father was emotionally abusive & my mother was often emotionally shut down, so my default when I'm tired or triggered is to either say something harsh or shut down. The Hand in Hand tools help me meet my children's needs & my own. We laugh a lot more together & share many more sweet moments. I also believe that I know my children better because of the Hand in Hand way. AND, my children get along so much better than they used to! I have noticed that my oldest uses the tools with her younger brother. It's amazing. I have read several parenting books & this one has been the most helpful.

What do our children need? To bee seen and heard! This book, which I will honestly say I have not read cover to cover, has been a goo to for me in my mental health private practice. Stay Listening is beautiful, doable, and helpful!

Excellent book! As a parent and as a teacher, this book has been very helpful in giving me better options when dealing with a child's poor behavior. It not only offers specific advice for problem behaviors, it gives ideas for preventing foreseeable problems before they happen. The book also lists additional resources available online on many areas where communication can break down between parents and children. I highly recommend this book. Please mark if you find my review helpful. Thank you so much!

I love this book. It’s the best parenting book I’ve ever read and is a must read for anyone who struggles with parenting due to growing up a parent who didn’t know how to love and support correctly. Helps heal negative patterns quickly so you can improve parenting with your own kids in real time.

I read this book over the course of several months with five other dads, and it genuinely changed all of our lives. It’s hard to put into words what this book has meant to us-and the impact it’s had on my relationship with my son. I now recommend it to everyone I speak with about parenting, though its insights are just as powerful for adult relationships as well.

This book is fantastic! Not your traditional parenting book at all. I came across Hand in Hand parenting online and this book brought all the tools together. My husband and I also completed the online 'sleep' class. Using these tools I have come to understand why my children are acting in a certain way. I always believed that children's 'bad' behaviour was a cry for help but this book explains that in more detail and also what do so when it happens and how to prevent it happening. The basis of this method of parenting are the 'listening tools'. Special time (spending a concentrated amount of time with your child during which they take the lead), staylistening (when your child is crying you resist the instinct to shush them and support them until they have released their tears) playlistening (making games out of some difficult scenarios to ease the tension and work through them), setting limits (we neither have to be permissive nor a strict disciplinarian to set limits - yay! Just calmly, verbally, set one clear limit and hold that, no threats or punishments) and most challenging of all, listening partnerships (listening time for parents, during which you take it in turns to vent your feelings about parenthood or any other bugbears for a period of time and try to discover WHY certain behaviours your children display trigger you). I can not recommend this book highly enough. By practising the listening tools I have regained my sanity by getting my children to sleep through the night. It sounds simple but my daughter went from sleeping in our bed, breastfeeding every 1-2 hours through the night and waking at 6am to sleeping through (most nights), in her own bed and then into a room with her brother. Her brother whose sleep had regressed in the build up to starting school went from not wanting to go to bed, waking during the night, wanting my husband to stay with him while he slept to going to bed with no bother, no more ever-increasing night time rituals and sleeping through. They now sleep through from 7pm to 7am. Massive achievement and it felt very healthy, not cruel at all, they were not abandoned but they managed to vent their emotions in a healthy way. Secondly these techniques mean that I am really enjoying my children for more than a fleeting moment at a time. They are also enjoying each other's company. It is blissful, this is how I thought parenting would be! Not that we don't have blips but we know how to fix things and quickly too.

Original product Good deal Speed delivery A good read for parents

This book explains the gentle parenting strategy in simple words with lot of real life stories.

A must have for parents, grandparents, teachers, educators, and anyone else involved in working with children! This book clearly explains both the importance of listening to our children and tools for how to ensure your child feels connected to you and loved.... all the time - through happiness, sadness, anger, frustrations, etc. This book shows you how to truly provide unconditional love to your child and how to parent with your heart.