I Don't Want a Divorce: A 90 Day Guide to Saving Your Marriage

the best council for couples in the easiest to understand format I've read. i wished i had read this book first when our marriage started going south.

This is unlike any other marriage book I've ever read; so if you feel like you've read soooo many marriage books and nothing is working, I'd highly recommend this book! I was always the I'll-do-whatever-it-takes-to-make-this-work kind of spouse; and I felt like I was the only one sacrificing and trying to please, and my husband just took and took and took -- and it still was never enough for him. Basically, I had no boundaries and wasn't really loving him well because I wasn't holding him accountable for improving himself as a person (and he just kept getting more and more awful the more I tried to dote on him). This book helped me love better. But it is not for the faint of heart. If you are ready to get down to the nitty gritty and start stepping up to the plate in a way that can change the entire dynamics of your relationship, this book is for you -- but it isn't about sunshine and roses. One of the things I loved about the approach is that it is a very clear step-by-step (almost hand-holding) approach that will lead you (and hopefully your spouse) to a change of heart that will lead to foundational changes in your marriage (or at the very least, in you).

As a (retired) marital therapist and husband of over 38 years, I view the content of this book as sound both psychologically and theologically. I agree with the author that even if the reader is not a Christian, he/she can benefit from applying the prinicples outlined throughout the book. My primary concern is that I wonder how many individuals and couples are spiritually and emtionally capable of navigating the prescribed exercises without the assitance of a therapist or discerning pastor. Also, I don't know what research supports this approach. In any event, this book provides a model for dealing with marital problems ranging from mild to severe. I parituclarly admire the author's stance on holding spouses who have commmitted "serious sins" which have severely impacted the marriage (e.g. adultery, addiction related behaviors) accountable in a highly structured way.Many marital self-help books and marital therapy textbooks have exercises designed to enhance caring behaviors, conflict resolution skills, and so on. In comparison, I'd say the exercises in this book - some are better than others - are overall worthwhile. Most of the sample written exercises reflected emotional maturity and insight which I suspect few people exhbit in the midst of martial turmoil. If you're not able to work through the marital issues outlined by Dr. Clarke on your own, again, consider enlisting the aid of a competent helping professional who shares your values. In turn, that professional would likely be comfortable with the basic approach outlined in this book, though he/she may not choose to adhere strictly to the book's approach

Excellent book.How to stop draining yourself with control. Anything but manipulation. Removing approval is NOT sin - quite the opposite! I don't know what book people were reading who claim these things. Lol. It wasn't this one. And it is NOT just for women either, although he knows it will be mostly woman reading it.This is not just about changing your spouse. You can't do that actually... 1. It's about helping them realize the seriousness of the problem. 2. Removing guilt. Its expected that you will do the right things to remove their excuses and give your best shot at making it work.You can't control the outcome or your spouse, you can control you and the environment you allow around you.I highly recommend.

Well written guide, that if it doesn’t work will provide you with insight to be ready for what comes next.

Pretty basic stuff here, written from a Christian perspective. A lot of it comes down to doing to your spouse what you want your spouse to do to you. Pretty simple: forgive, forget, love; forgive, forget, love. That is the dance of marriage. If you get hung up on any of those three, you might as well stay single.

This program will restore a marriage if followed

This book changed my life and my marriage. One of the most important things I took away was to communicate better, which seems like a no-brainer but the book really lit a light bulb. I now tell my husband how I appreciate him every day and realize that we're two different people and that requires me to communicate differently to him than how I would like someone to communicate to me. I know I'm not making the best case for this book, but it really opened my eyes and our marriage has improved markedly.

This is a how-to book for women, an instruction manual on how to manipulate their husbands.

As expected and in time

Terrible, written badly and from a very strict religious background, if thats your thing then this might be for you, however I am not religious and do not follow the rules that woman should follow men